Christine Smith Nude
You don’t have to be Doctor Dolittle to date Miss December, but you should be open to some ardent petting. “If a guy doesn’t like animals, it won’t work,” says Christine. “I’ve had dogs that just did not like somebody and basically chased him out the door. I had another 140-pound dog that would sit on the couch between me and my date and just start pushing to get between us as much as possible. They’ve been right so far, so I’m going to listen to the dogs from now on.”
Assuming we could get past the dogs — we always carry a slice of salami in our wallet for that very purpose — we wonder what Christine’s ideal date would be. We remind her that she wrote on her Playboy questionnaire that it would involve “camping, fine wine, a fire and one sleeping bag.” Now she rolls her eyes and laughs. “Well, that would be a good date if I knew the guy for a while,” she says. “Otherwise you’re stuck on a mountain with someone on a first date and you realize he’s annoying. He would get to sleep on pinecones. That’s why it usually takes me about two weeks of asking questions and getting feedback from random people who know him before I go on a date with someone.”
We thought we’d turn the tables and ask Christine a few random Smith questions since this uncommon beauty has the most common name in America. How many John Smiths are in your family? “I don’t think there are any! But there are hundreds of Smiths in the phone book, so there may be some I don’t know about.” Could you rat your hair like Robert Smith of the Cure? “I don’t think I could do that myself, nor would I want to. It would take lots and lots of hair spray.” In the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith, which half of the couple is sexier? “Nothing against Brad Pitt, but Angelina Jolie is the hottest woman alive.” What’s your favorite Kevin Smith movie? “I think Chasing Amy is the only one I’ve seen.” Would you ever buy anything from the Jaclyn Smith collection at Kmart? “Maybe in about 20 years.”
Years ago a band named Smith had a hit with a song called “Baby, It’s You.” No doubt they had Christine in mind.
Photography by Arny Freytag and Stephen Wayda